the only times ive been able to sleep severalhours is when i was sleeping w someone how weird is that lmao
like if i shared a bed w a friend i could easily sleep 10+ hours

and the only other times i can sleep that much is at my grandparents house or when my body is so exhausted i can barely think


and of course i still want my face tobe punched for being so ugh


idk im just sad bc theyre not talking to me at all and it feels like theyre intentionally ignoring me and that really hurts lol


and im not sleeping much now like on average im getting 4-5 hours and then one day of the week i pass out for 10 hours+


theres another thing but thats about someone on tumblr so
yea lol im just not feeling well plus the higher dosage of the bc means the side effects are stronger and last time i did have mood changes so it looks like thats happening again


ok so basically issues going on
-parents fighting again and this happens like once every 2-3 years and it can get pretty bad because they tend to shove me in the middle and then get angry when im crying
-dad wants to take my dog with him back to texas and betty helps me out a lot with stress and anxiety so i dont want her to leave plus he lives in a semi truck rn so how is that gonna be an ideal place for betty to live in
he has does nothing for her how is he gonna get her proper food and water and take her to pee


-might be playing soccer and canoe battleship
-might join equestrian club


i seriously hope the security guard doesnt see me tomorrow he can tell when somethings off in me rlly easily and idont want to have to make up some reason bc i know he can tell im lying


things to be happy of
-nike iridescent shoes arriving soon
-got paid
-ahead in the nursing major track
-dog
-getting colder outside
-supermoon
-better driving skills
-good grades
-dad not here
-papaya tree growing fast


i want someone to punch me in the face im having too many emotions im sick o f crying